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HELP !!! SOMEBODY PLEASE HELP ME !!! Sports News
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HELP !!! SOMEBODY PLEASE HELP ME !!!


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HELP !!! SOMEBODY PLEASE HELP ME !!!
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Reputation:49
Level:Rookie
Since:Jan 4, 2008

May 16, 2008 10:36 am
DUDES..... so last night I'm driving home and feeling kinda lonely so when I pull up to this traffic light and look to my right and there happend to be this chick standing there........ Now in the amber light of the street lights she look pretty freaking hot.... or that could have just been the sleep getting to me. So anyways I ask how much and she say $50. Well I just happend to have that on me so I think sure why not. Take her to a hotel and take her as soon as we get into the room. We didnt even turn on the lights we were going at it so fast..... In retrospective this might have been a good thing as that probably would have ended the deal right there. She was even nice enough to allow me a second comming after a 30 min nap. Well after I droped her off and went home I noticed a slight burning sensation around my johnson..... This morning under closer inspection I noticed a reddish rash. WHAT THE CRAP IS GOING ON??!?!?!?! I need your help.....

HELP !!! SOMEBODY PLEASE HELP ME !!!
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Reputation:49
Level:Rookie
Since:Jan 4, 2008

May 16, 2008 10:37 am
It itches and burns when I pee.... Oh god somebody please help me....

HELP !!! SOMEBODY PLEASE HELP ME !!!
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Reputation:92
Level:All-Star
Since:Dec 22, 2006

May 16, 2008 10:40 am
Whatever you do DON'T PEE anymore!!!













and where'd YOU get fifty bucks?

HELP !!! SOMEBODY PLEASE HELP ME !!!
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Reputation:96
Level:Superstar
Since:Jan 7, 2008

May 16, 2008 10:42 am
Drive to her house and scream that you love her, if she doesn't agree to marriage right there then kill her and bury her in the woods.

HELP !!! SOMEBODY PLEASE HELP ME !!!
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Reputation:98
Level:Superstar
Since:Nov 5, 2006

May 16, 2008 10:45 am
get ready for the Q-tip!!!  and if you dont know what i am talking about, you will soon enough!

HELP !!! SOMEBODY PLEASE HELP ME !!!
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Reputation:93
Level:All-Star
Since:Nov 19, 2007

May 16, 2008 10:46 am
Well did you wrap your tool?

HELP !!! SOMEBODY PLEASE HELP ME !!!
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Reputation:99
Level:Superstar
Since:May 30, 2007

May 16, 2008 10:46 am
You raw dogged a hooker?  What were you thinking?

HELP !!! SOMEBODY PLEASE HELP ME !!!
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Reputation:96
Level:Superstar
Since:Jan 7, 2008

May 16, 2008 10:48 am
get ready for the Q-tip!!!

You make me want to vomit.

HELP !!! SOMEBODY PLEASE HELP ME !!!
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Reputation:98
Level:Superstar
Since:Nov 5, 2006

May 16, 2008 10:49 am

not only did he raw dog a hooker.... he raw dogged a $50 hooker he found on a street corner!!!

with judgement like this, he must be a bengal fan!!


HELP !!! SOMEBODY PLEASE HELP ME !!!
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Reputation:97
Level:Superstar
Since:Sep 13, 2007

May 16, 2008 10:49 am
I have a feeling your yanking everyone's chain, but I'll pretend your serious:

Go to mdadvice.com.  They have a variety of symptoms and illnesses, from sports injuries to your particular area of concern.  It can only give general advice, though, so you need to bite the bullet and see a doctor. If you do have something, you must get treatment.  Even if your symptoms go away, you will be a carrier without proper treatment.  Try your local health department if you don't have insurance or don't want your doctor to know.

And for the love of god, stay celibate until you know what's going on and have received the appropriate treatment.  After this maybe avoid the street women; or at least use protection, idiot.

HELP !!! SOMEBODY PLEASE HELP ME !!!
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Reputation:49
Level:Rookie
Since:Jan 4, 2008

May 16, 2008 10:57 am
Dudes.... one does not have time to worry about protection when duty calls..... beside she said she was clean. And I had backup...... saran wrap around the shaft to prevent infections...... always carry a box with me .. you know just in case.

HELP !!! SOMEBODY PLEASE HELP ME !!!
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Reputation:49
Level:Rookie
Since:Jan 4, 2008

May 16, 2008 10:59 am

and where'd YOU get fifty bucks?

 

I found it...... why are you a cop?


HELP !!! SOMEBODY PLEASE HELP ME !!!
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Reputation:96
Level:Superstar
Since:Jan 23, 2008

May 16, 2008 10:59 am
WHAT THE CRAP IS GOING ON??!?!?!?! Growing pains.  You woke him up and he finally realized he's alive. Just pet him a couple of times and say " that's okay little fella."

HELP !!! SOMEBODY PLEASE HELP ME !!!
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Reputation:92
Level:All-Star
Since:Dec 22, 2006

May 16, 2008 11:14 am

and where'd YOU get fifty bucks?

 I found it...... why are you a cop?


 


 

No Governor, I'm no cop.


HELP !!! SOMEBODY PLEASE HELP ME !!!
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Reputation:98
Level:Superstar
Since:Jan 15, 2007

May 16, 2008 11:15 am
 not only did he raw dog a hooker.... he raw dogged a $50 hooker he found on a street corner!!!

with judgement like this, he must be a bengal fan!!

LMAO

either that, or a Bengals player.


HELP !!! SOMEBODY PLEASE HELP ME !!!
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Reputation:94
Level:All-Star
Since:Sep 12, 2007

May 16, 2008 11:15 am
The only way to get rid of the burning sensation is to go out side right now and start to dry hump the sidewalk.  You must do this to remove all the skin.  once the skin has been removed you will want to empty a large bottle of lime juice on it.  This will remove the infection.  What you are gonna want to do next is empty a bottle of Tobbasco sauce on it and wrap it with gauze.  This will insure that the infection won't come back.

HELP !!! SOMEBODY PLEASE HELP ME !!!
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Reputation:79
Level:Pro
Since:May 6, 2008

May 16, 2008 11:20 am
The best thing you can do is NOTHING!!!  Eventually the itching and buring will get so bad that your little pinky of a member will turn black and fall off.  At which point we will all be happier knowing that you wont be able to reproduce.

HELP !!! SOMEBODY PLEASE HELP ME !!!
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Reputation:97
Level:Superstar
Since:Oct 5, 2007